One thing is certain of failure: the deeper the failure entrenches himself in its mire the less appealing he looks to others who have avoided it.

What is the first prerequisite for being a romantic? Well, in all probability, the capacity to die young while eating one’s words for lunch.

The only problem with a good witch-hunt is that not everybody who’s interested in natural justice can get involved in it.

With all this sanctimonious codswallop these evangelists come up with it’s a wonder they don’t go and join the venerable society of sanctimonious bull shiners, or is that an oxymoron of some kind?

Balancing sanity on a pinhead is something best left for philosophers to ponder over, if, indeed they have the social skills to do it.

One should try not to irritate those in authority too much but not at the cost of being enslaved to it, it would be too much like a marriage.

It’s remarkable how sweet and juicy a good bit of well-timed betrayal feels, especially when it’s totally uncalled for. As an act of personal growth, it can be thoroughly recommended to all normally minded persons.

Greed is an essential ingredient for ambition; or, at least, it whets the appetite for it.

“Friends” have their own agendas. Which roughly means, if you want to be a friend, you should have one too.

Of course, where people are concerned, Niccolò Machiavelli said it all; however, not all that many people know what he was on about.

Some men can just talk and talk and talk, and still say nothing, and during social intercourse many frequently do as a matter of policy.

Sometimes one finds that it is too late to learn something…and that it was a long time coming.

Play is something done in all seriousness only if you already know that those whom you play with know this already, and play the game.

It is not necessary to thank anybody for nothing it’s when he wants to take it back without payment that you have to complain to someone.

There is a general consensus among intellectuals that their ignorance is better than a fool’s knowledge. Happily, though, they can never prove it.

One should be wary of those who come to you at a bad time and make it worse; which is a good reason to ignore most people.

One should be careful of those who run along the street; it is not that they are in a hurry, which is excusable, but that they have nothing better to do than to run to where they are going, and so are already too late to arrive in a more appropriate manner.

It is not always necessary to know where you are, exactly, but it is probably vital to know you’re on the same planet as everybody else, if not on the same plane of existence.

It is a truth that generally remains unrecognised by those who do not have it that advantage stays with those who work for it; anybody else can generally go and do the washing up.

As those in the know know they do not know, what then do those who do not know know, nothing? But, at least, they would know this.

I would not say that great teachers are not good at teaching what they know, only that they definitely do not like their teachings being rejected by those who don’t.

Failure is that personal attribute which enables complete strangers to comment upon the failures and short fallings endemic in the neglect or omission of expected or required action within a failure’s entirely wasted life.

One of life’s greatest fallacies is that when people see a man drowning they’re likely to throw him a lifebelt. They’re more likely to throw him an anchor.

The world wouldn’t be a fair place to live without being able to blame someone or other for one’s troubles, so one would probably deserve all the blame one gets.

Pay no mind to what another man thinks of you, as he has never walked in your shoes and if he hadn’t any of his own he would probably pinch yours as well into the bargain.

As the bonds that bind us tend to grow tighter the more we struggle against them, so why struggle against them, why not go with the flow instead?

What should be watched for is not what men do, but why they do it; and, if they need emulating, well, they’re probably dodgy anyway.

Nobody should want to hang about with somebody who has no interest in what he does or how he reacts, and vice versa also, even though they’re clearly well-suited to one another.

For every person who ever wanted something more, there is another person who went out and got it. This may not be true, but there is only one way to prove it.

Consider your own attitude towards the mentally ill or psychologically deformed, and that is the attitude most of society would have towards you if you became so, which, after all, really isn’t very nice but is probably quite justified.

Men should be prepared to hang their principles from the flagpoles (to blow in the wind), it’s the only way to be certain that they don’t cause too much of a flap.

If he likes to do it anybody who disagrees with people has a head start in a friendly conversation.

It’s impossible to say something foolish or inane without lacking the intelligence to fully understand its true meaning, or at least not until after it’s been said.

Someone who is being criticised generally gets exactly what he deserves: free advice. Attack couched as criticism, though, is the abomination of abominations, but it can still prove quite entertaining.

Arrogance is an indication that one doesn’t know what one is doing; which in turn is a kind of behaviour that is usually closely followed by one’s comeuppance.

Sometimes you’ve got to know when to punch someone in the jaw; and if you’re going to do that then you had better know how to punch someone in the jaw properly: for good and all.

For every freedom earned there’s a smashed hope that goes along with it, just to provide supporting evidence for a general lack of happiness in the world.

Fair weather friends: acquaintances who have got too close to the truth and are blow away by it.

What can we say of the “artiste” who decides, without further adieu, to “bow out” prematurely Why, we haven’t even got the chance to unceremoniously kick him off the stage for the bald faced cheek of actually turning up in the first place!

Friendships: don’t be fooled by them into doing something foolish about them.

Sometimes what we seek can never be found, but then, conversely, what we’ve found can never be sought, and there must be something instructive in that.

The more good advice you have to remember to get by with the more good advice you tend to forget, until, eventually, the only good advice you need to remember is the good advice you have neglected to discard but cannot forget.

Why accept our limitations? We can have so much more fun believing we can overcome them.

Much immediately applicable social theory can be encapsulated in a very small mind, but it certainly doesn’t always stay there.

Our work as men, so some say, is to grow as human beings, although it seems that most men, after a good while, can only manage to grow sideways.

Whether or not a young man has an idea in his head or not is secondary to whether he knows his place or not, as if he doesn’t then any idea that he has got is bound to be a bad one.

Laziness is simply the inability of a particular individual to do what he should be doing, for himself, what anybody else thinks he should be doing is beside the point (although that opinion can in itself become very pointed).

A teacher is generally someone who knows a lot about his own subject; consequently, he sells only what he owns. However, he does not often tell you what he does not sell, and rarely what he does.

Every life has a story to it, and like all stories every life must end with a full stop. Even if its author is a no account no talent hack with an ego to match.

What characterizes a successful person is tenacity, without it he is somebody else less lucky (although “luck”, in doing what he is successful at, has nothing whatsoever to do with his success).

Does humanity need saving? Possibly only from itself. Which is probably rather a contradiction in terms, and so the question posed must necessarily have been a silly one.

As they say, “It’s better to die on one’s feet than to live on one’s knees.” The trick, then, is in the avoidance of stumbling.

Do not too quickly condemn the man who does nothing all too well, as, after all, he has had much help in doing it, and help from people much like you too.

What more encourages us to waste our time other than there is more of it to waste if we don’t?

In the scales where the ordinary is measured everyday, the exotic is just another kind of strange fruit in the market place.

It is a general truth commonly accepted amongst the ignorant that even an ignoramus could be seen as being clever sometimes, but not often.

Logic can lead you a merry dance, until you finally realize that you cannot fly gracefully out of your bedroom window wearing a fully functional birdman suit, and not also expect to fly gracefully up the garden path as well.

There’s nothing like getting a birthday card one month before it’s one’s birthday, which naturally tops not getting one at all.

A bore is someone who knows enough about people to hold a conversation, but not why to have it with anybody but himself.

Power commands respect, but can only demand the going price for it.

Life is way too short to be taken with a pinch of salt. Eternity, though, is far too long not to be taken any other way.

The stranger in society is usually asked to “go away”, which is probably why there are so many strange people travelling about the world.

Being just “a little too clever” is never really much good, especially when there’s no real money in it.

Only the most uncouth of individuals don’t quickly step away from each other when they want to, even when it is all one-sided.

One-fifth of people are permanently dead-set against everything, all the time; the remainder could go either way, depending on the state of the whether.

People, being points of view, in essence tend to go off in tangents all over the place, but, still, keep on pointing anyway.

That wealth which is not valued cannot be held, and sometimes not even fondled.

A useful idea cannot be used without earning the right to use it first, or at least nothing good can be made out of it.

It’s never too late for someone who’s young enough for it to make a new start, but that should never prevent anyone from pursuing an old one.

It is probably unacceptable to say that pacifists should be hung from the lampposts, but it is perhaps slightly more acceptable for pacifists to say that those who say so should be strung up there instead.

Dedicated seekers of worldly-wisdom should understand one thing: the juiciest morsels are all found under rocks.

Fortunately, failure teaches you who your friends are and where your enemies dwell. Unfortunately, if it doesn’t teach you any better than to lean this then it’s not worth the effort.

Almost all effective ways of avoiding making a fool of oneself begins, initially, by asking oneself why one does it.

It is in the nature of work that “it must be done”, or else, in being curious about why not, people will ask you why.

Sometimes it is necessary to find something to fight for, and such thoughts of “death or glory” should always start with oneself.

Within the system the system is there to be used, and it is also there to be maintained in use. This is good news for the system and the people who use the system, because if it were not maintained in use then it wouldn’t work.

We should not wish to inflict our more intimate failures upon other people if we can help it; after all, they have their own to worry about.

It is emotionally easing, knowing that nobody gives a damn what you do so long as you do it elsewhere, to say nothing of being spiritually enlightening.

There is an old phrase, “Beware of what you wish for, you might get it.” This means nothing to those who don’t understand it, but everything to those who do.

It’s unusual to stand upon the principle of un-principality, but if one stands on one leg and juggles with one’s words at the same time, then perhaps it’s not so odd after all.

Suicide is not driven by a lack of faith in the future; it is driven by the conviction that the future is unalterable.

There is generally “not much to mind” in the “civilized” beliefs of another person, and as much as one’s own, although, generally, this doesn’t make his beliefs any more true either.

It is not the optimist that attempts to jump a chasm in a single bound, it is the pessimist who has been pushed too far.

The work ethic has one redeeming moral quality: the constantly selfish desire to improve one’s position.

When all has been said and done, and the truth of the matter has been settled for good and all, remember: after all, nobody’s ever that right, all the time; and even if this were not so, and after all that, death shuts all open books, flat, and without comment, no matter what’s written in them.

Over-reaction will always be a subject for fair comment to those people who can remain in control of themselves without overreacting.

Blessed are those who have their work, for they shall always have more to do.

There is no substitute for hard work, and the only remedy for that is to get someone else to do it for you.

The dumber you are, the more hard work you can be asked to do.

Saying something quite profound can still prove to be rather dull to the profoundly uninterested.

A failure is on his own: nobody either wishes to lead him or follow him, anywhere, anyhow, or anyway. This is the spur of industry.

Those who tend to use oblique praise in their insinuations should at least try to be more direct about it.

What can we do about those who clearly dislike us? Well, the best thing to do is to clearly recognize what they look like, long before they get anywhere near us.

Even the nicest people can be quite unpleasant at times; perhaps that’s because they often need to be, but more often it’s usually just because they can.

Chucking your whole kit and caboodle in with luck when you don’t need to can be a very risky thing to do in the luck of the draw, so why do it? Take a chance on permanence instead.

A fellow can sit down and do nothing for a very long time, and, it should be noted, even a man can do this when he can find nothing better to do with himself other than contemplate the infinite that’s been encapsulated in a nutshell, for effect.

Push a man out of kilter and he’ll run, not walk to the edge of the cliff; but making him jump even then needs a good push to go with it or else he just won’t budge.

People do like to see other people working, and the more the merrier (and all at once or in small groups of them), if only for the exercise it gives them in doing so.

The observative is much more pernicious than the contemplative, although the contemplative also has its moments.

Reserving judgement is not the same as making no judgement, but in effect it’s probably just as obtuse.

It is as easy to step off the planet as it is to step onto it. But no one should be wailing as he or she goes, as that is probably a marked overreaction to the inevitable.